I once dated a guy that one of my “friends” had hooked me up with. I use the term loosely in this situation because in hindsight, I have to wonder if she was really ever a true friend. This guy was gorgeous… he resembled Ice Cube. He dated her cousin years ago, before she passed at a very young age of cancer and they had a child together…. Until I met him, I’d never been disrespected by a man or even heard the words “bitch” said to me by one. I noticed he talked to all women like that… but I stuck around. I said something to my “friend” and she said, “Aw girl, he talks to everybody like that.” Although he did, that didn’t make it okay.
I knew this guy had a temper… when he and her cousin dated years ago (it was over ten!) she told me about him dragging her down the steps by the hair… I also had heard about him fighting.. But I never thought I’d see it. I was a sweet girl.
One day, he wanted me to drive somewhere and I didn’t feel like it. I was in the passenger seat.. he got into the backseat and we just sat there arguing about it for a while. I guess he finally got pissed enough and ended up twisting my arm back so far that I felt it pop in the socket (mind you he was still in the backseat). He was bigger than me, and stronger… at that time I was 5’6″ and probably 135 lbs… I went ahead and got in the drivers seat, drove his ass home and dropped him off, angry/hurt tears falling down my face the entire time. I sped away….
This was my first and only account with a man putting his hands on me… I against men beating/hitting women BUT there are times when a woman need to be RESTRAINED.
I don’t think a woman should ever put her hands on a man or be in his face pointing and yelling. Times like this, I’m okay with a tight bear hug or something to stop it. ;
What do you think? Have you ever had a run in with abuse? Are there any acceptable times for a man to “put his hands on a woman?”