Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

This love is taking all of my energy….. October 28, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sunny @ 7:04 am

In Keri Hilson’s song, “Energy,” she sings,

“I wish I could rip out a page of my memory                             
Cuz I put to much energy in him and me
Can’t wait til’ I get through this phase
Cuz it’s killing me
To bad we can’t re-write our own history”

It’s well known that I’m the psychologist among my friends (which is probably why I’ve decided to make a career out of it).

Anywho, last night I was counseling  talking to one of my friends and she recently parted ways with the father of her unborn child.  She told him that she was tired of loving him.   After she told him that, he couldn’t understand.  He argued back that he loved her, even when they argue CONSTANTLY… He questioned how one could be exhausted from love.

I knew exactly what my friend was talking about.  I have been there.   I love tempestuously one moment, forgiving and staying throughout the bull, then, one morning I wake up with a renewed “Energy” and before you know it, I’ve sprinkled you with fairy dust and packed my stuff up (figuratively) and left.  I love myself too much to lose myself.

What about you?  Do you understand what my friend was saying?  Have you ever found yourself in a situation where love was taking all of “Energy?”

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11 Responses to “This love is taking all of my energy…..”

  1. Shelia Says:

    Girl I found myself in that situation before but I got out of it and have been much happier since. I think the reason why we stay in “bad” relationships longer than we should is because of familiarity. When you get used to a person and the bad treatment, it becomes the norm. The key is the person has to love themselves more than they love the other person. When you can do that, you’ll be able to break the crazy cycle of a yo-yo relationship. Is it easy to leave what you know along? No, but as with any habit–a bad habit can be broken.

  2. thecomebackgirl Says:

    I really feel as though people think love is suppose to be about the toil the slave struggle…hell to the naw…and if it is i don’t want none. Love should be organic. Its not all peaches and ice cream but I think it should be commin up more rosey than not.

    sadly people like a bunch of confusion not just in love but also work. I cant get down like that. to me it means you have an unfullfling life..my imagination and all the other shyt im doing has TONS of excitement and drama..i don’t need that in my everyday walking life..esp not with a man.

  3. nickisunshine Says:

    “a bad habit can be broken.”

    And AMEN!

    “I really feel as though people think love is suppose to be about the toil the slave struggle”

    I feel the same way… people make it seem like loving is so hard. I have to wonder if, it’s so hard, why stay in it?

  4. thecomebackgirl Says:

    “why stay in it?”

    i honestly believe people like pain.

  5. Anitra Says:

    Bad relationships zap energy and I dunno if its just a libra thing but it just seems like it only takes one bad moment with a dude to funk up my whole day (if im really feeling him or we are dating not random dudes)

    i had that happen a couple times where i didn’t wanna go to work and all that jazz, so i had to stop messin with dudes like that because well i HAVE to go to work! shat!

    ps that song bites!

  6. nickisunshine Says:

    “ps that song bites!”

    I’m cracking up. Dang, Mik!

    “i honestly believe people like pain.”

    I think you are right… Oh, I have an idea for a post now!

  7. Anitra Says:

    I’m sayin Nicki she sounds like a cat who had its tail stepped on!!

  8. jac427 Says:

    OH ok…yeah I hate that song. What’s even funnier is I completely understand exactly what the deal is…I lose all my energy like a dude will have me staying in bed and hiding under a rock.

  9. Junior Says:

    Ugh….that happened with an ex of mine. I pursued her doggedly trying to keep things going smoothly, even when I felt that things were going down a bad path, but I figured that if i worked at it, things would work out. NOPE was so wrong, and to make a long story short, after being apart for about 6 months, I found out that she had started sleeping with other people, but that was the final straw and I realized that loving her was sapping all of my energy. After that it was time to move the ef around. So in short, I def. understand what is being said.

  10. terrence Says:

    I think all serious relationships require change, a whole lot of compromise, and sacrifice. Some people say its all about compatibility – I believe its all about love and how much of an effort you want to make in order to grow that relationship – everything is work to me and if you want a healthy relationship, you have to work at it, and there has to be a team effort when you have a lot of differences. You get out what you put in…I’ve been telling myself that its ok to, “waste a lot of my energy” trying to hold my relationship together when things have become extremely difficult. Things can get so bad sometimes and my only solution is to stay positive and focus on the love you have for that person. Some days can be completely miserable, but the good times can overpower them. I might be kidding myself and I will know pretty soon, but if love is worth it to you (it sure is to me), you’ll fight depending on how strong you believe in it – no matter how much energy you put forth – that energy is a tough subject cuz you can try just like me to hold it together, and you can end up heartbroken and mad @ the time and energy you wasted – on the other hand however, you can put that energy into saving the relationship and do just that!

  11. Terrance, you raised some very good points. I think you will be willing to fight to keep love in the right situation, but u have to figure out if that person is willing to fight for. Do they love you as much as you love them? I’ve learned “don’t make someone a priority in your life when you are only an option in theirs.” If a person is not feeling as strongly about you as you are for them, it’s time to make a decision.


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