Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

Let’s Talk About… December 2, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — FlawedBeauty @ 12:01 am


*takes mic from Nicki whose still singing NERD from two weeks ago*

I have a very important thing to discuss with you, my blog fam, today. I would like to know how long after meeting someone do you feel it necessary to shake some sheets.

Now in my 2? years, I have had partners where it’s been a year plus or just a few hours.

Beyond this, what are the criteria that make both men and women weak in the knees enough to move someone from “how you doin” to ooooh right there?

So the post today poses a two fold question…how long do you wait and what do you find to be sexy?


11 Responses to “Let’s Talk About…”

  1. Tea Says:

    Each situation is different. If it’s a man that you really like you should definitely wait until you’re comfortable with the time you’ve spent with them…for me that’s around 2-3 months of consistent contact.

    If it’s someone who I just want to wet my whistle and can’t see myself dating for any number of reasons…i.e. he’s a freaking idiot then i’m gonna make it do what it do.

    Intelligence turns me on, nice pecks makes me moist and big body beamers…ooooh lawd, yes mam right there, lol.

  2. HAA! You trying to be funny Jac. [snatches mike back. J/K]

    I’ve never had a certain amount of time to wait before having sex; it’s whenever the mood hits me. Now, I’m far from a slore, so I wasn’t out hitting every Tom, Dick, and Harry, but if I met a guy and we dated and say after the fifth date, if I felt like doing it, I did.

    I’ve learned… and this is not the way I go about things now. Being celibate almost a year, the next guy WILL be waiting [sorry! Stock up your lotion} because I’m worth waiting for. If he doesn’t see fit, then kick rocks.

    What gets me….. kisses, a nice smile, intelligence and humor, a cologne’d neck.

  3. i think it totally depends on the person. At this point in my life I want something more. More takes a little time to develop outside of the pillowtop, so ….for me it may be a few months.

    re sexy???? A man who takes a different (world/social/political) viewpoint and manages to change my mind without me fully realizing that that’s what he did.

    sexy…that unspoken communication.

    sexy…a guy smokin a cigar and not really givin a fyuck what anyone thinks about it..

  4. jac427 Says:

    Post today is extra short. I meant to make some edits but…oh well…

    I’ma come back and tell you why I wrote this.

  5. Britt Says:

    I don’t really have a hard and fast rule for how long I wait. However, I do have to feel REALLY comfy with someone in order to exchange fluids, so I have never partaken in one night stands and other things people probably consider fun. Because I want to feel REALLY comfy, 99.9% of the men I date can’t touch this. The more you know about somebody the less you want to screw them, at least in my experience.

  6. Eb Says:

    I never put perameters on it… I think its all on the chemistry and how you’re feeling… yes I have had a one night stand… and then there have been dudes I have talked to for over 6 months that still hadnt gotten any… mostly because I only mess with one person at a time and if the person who was already getting it is doing everything I need aint no point in adding another to the final number…

    usually though… I have that 60-90 rule in the back of my mind if its someone I am really trying to get to know like that

  7. Junior Says:

    Month 11 day two of celibacy blues…I’m out of lotion…

    Seriously, from the male perspective, I think it depends on what you’re looking to get out of that particular relationship. If I allow myself to have a one night stand, chances are I intended on keeping you around only that night. Tupac said it best though, “I don’t want it if its that easy”, the longer you make me wait….well clearly it shows that I have the intent to stay with you in the long run, no way in hell a brother like myself is going to sit around waiting for the P, when I can make that ish rain!

    But I guess the question was more so directed to how long do you wait until you get it…. and I’m an advocate at after “hello” :).

    As far as sexy…is there anything on the female body that isn’t?! Feet, calves, back-side, arms, breast, necks, face!!!

  8. Jolie Fatale Says:

    OH Jac,
    I was asking myself this very question all weekend.. how long should i wait .. how long should i… sigh

    And then my friend shiny penny said I should at least wait 4-6 weeks.. so I am but I clearly want this man NOW and its only been a week.. LE SIGH>>

  9. I think the time should be counted in terms of “dates”. I think 5 solid dates should qualify … given one a week and convo in between … and also assuming 2 weeks before he gets the first one.

    Damn … 7 weeks … I take it back. 3-4 dates. And really good dates can count as double.

    I agree with Junior though … I will take it in 15 minutes if you giving … just don’t expect to talk to me about anything besides “when’s next time”. Tupac had it right.

  10. Shelia Says:

    It depends. I agree with Teacia, if its someone you want to build a relationship with, you shouldn’t be rushing to have sex with them because sex will cloud your vision (especially if he’s all that).

    If you just need a little maintenance after you’re sure they are disease free, do what you do.

    A man who smells good…can hold an intelligent conversation turns me on.

  11. Bam Says:

    Turn ons. And potential vision clouders for me:
    Nice smile, Handsome, neat haircut, smells good, dark (and I mean dark) complexion and a nice physique. Just one of these won’t do it. He must have all of them simultaneously. I got one of these in my life now who I know ain’t permanent but when I smell him…
    Oh my damn.
    Lacoste Essential… This man has me wearing his cologne it smells so good on him.


    Anyway. I am in the same vein as everyone else. How soon I give it to him depends on a lot. If I am in one of my fleeting moods it could happen sooner than if I am in a funky niggah come wit it mood. And then mister man described above can get it behind a little too much to drink on a Friday after a long hard week after a 20 minute date.

    I’m exaggerating, but I guess I am saying everyone has a hot button.


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