Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

Hi Hater! A SSSO Series January 27, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sunny @ 10:00 pm

I’m just gonna preface and say I hate the word “hater.”  For me, it’s overuse is up there with the word “swag.”  I try not to use either, but for today, I’ll make an exception.  😉

The Urban Dictionary defines “hater” a few ways, one of them:

A label applied to people who are more negative than positive when discussing another person. It most commonly refers to individuals whose negativity is so extreme that it is all-consuming. However, there are various levels and forms of being a hater, ranging from completely dismissing any positive traits or actions, to merely painting a less than flattering picture by using words with negative connotations. Hating is often attributed to jealousy, but just as often, it seems to stem from some other source.

Let’s get something straight, telling the honest truth is not hating.  Take this conversation:

Eva:  Girl, how does this dress look on me?

Chanel:  Ummm, it’s looking a little tight.  You might want to go up a size.

Eva: *scrunches nose*   I’on know what you talking about, I look good.  Hate much?

Lesson to be learned:  If you can’t handle the truth, don’t ask for it. But I digress. 

There are so many forms of hating… from folks hating on your “swag” to your success to your relationships.  I don’t subscribe to the “if people aren’t hating, then you aren’t doing it big” or whatev. To me,  that insinuates that hating is okay.  Haters need healing and maybe a self esteem class. 

That being said, what are your thoughts on haters?  How do you deal with them?  

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13 Responses to “Hi Hater! A SSSO Series”

  1. Anitra Says:

    I think there are just over all negative folks out in the world and nothing you can really do about that. I have sometimes confused “Tellin me the truth” with being a hater a time or two but it happens. I can’t really validate either or because every situation is just different to me.

  2. Jolie Fatale Says:

    nick .. you are SUCH a hater for this post.. LMAO .. hahahaha .. jk..

    I hate the word too .. (pun intended)

  3. ” I can’t really validate either or because every situation is just different to me.”

    Huh?

    ** sticks tongue out at Jolster**

  4. asankofaqueen Says:

    the word hater has been over used I agree

    there will always be someone, wether u are rich poor fat skinny tall or short that will have a problem with u and how u do. that’s a part of life. they hated on jesus, why should I expect 2 only get love from people?

  5. Jealousy and envy are so unhealthy for the soul. And when you spend most of YOUR day worried bout what I’m doing good or bad with my life and wishing ill will toward me and mine…you’sa HATER!

    When you spend your time going around talking nonsense about me to whoever will stop and listen…you’sa HATER.

    And I need for you to do one of two things…either get your OWN life and stop wishing you had mine…or go play in traffic.

    The End!

    Morning Ladies and Gents!

  6. Holly GoLightly Says:

    For some reason this post reminded me of Katt Williams skit on Haters!!

  7. thecomebackgirl Says:

    I hate the word hater too..but i always seem to use it ALOT..Its just misdirected envy. Everyone has a little of that. EVERYONE. But I feel like its from a total lack of selfawareness.

    To me everybody brings a little sumtin sumtin to the playground. Thats better than the next kid. People spend so much time worrying about what somebody elese got and doing they forget that they got that THANG THANG that blows somebody else’s out the water.

    but..alot of people don’t know what that thang thang is…and i bet 50 million bucks that if the hater could find it..the hate would stop. cause harnessing your own “thang” takes all the time out of hating on someone else.

    “real talk”…i hate real talk btw LOL

  8. Holly GoLightly Says:

    @Comeback- I overly use hater as well and real talk! LOL!!

  9. peyso Says:

    @ CBG – The prophetic Andre 3000, once wrote “If you say real talk, I probably dont trust you”

    I personally like haters, i like to know that ppl are thinking of me

  10. Jazz Says:

    I don’t hate the word “hater” because honestly the world is full of haters. You always gonna find someone that’s going to hate for some reason or another. But I can’t stand people that hate on people for no particular reason at all.

    Hater men marry hater women and have hater kids- Kanye

    They don’t like themselves that’s why they hate on everything.

  11. Sad to say .. I’m a well known hater. I don’t hate out of jealously, I don’t hate to be mean … I’m just not easily impressed, have a smart ass mouth, and I’m a pessimist by nature.

    But these skills also have helped me a lot. When folks run business ideas by me, I can give them all the holes for them to patch up. I can edit stuff decently well. And when people want real deal advice … I’m your man.

    Case in point … I recently had to tell someone “Your broke” … and it was no hating … just a real and pessimistic analysis of their cash flow.

  12. B&TT Says:

    My first time commenting here…I luv your site ladies!!
    Sigh ohh haters…
    I think the only time I hate is on celebs..I mean their stuff is out there for all to see…and its more envy than anything!! lol
    As for real life…I feel discouraged when a so-called good friend who u thought had yur back starts switchin it up on you…all their constructive critism slowly turns into verbal diarrhea…I’m going through that right now…best way to handle that…distance yourself from them…they dont give a *uck about you!!!
    Like the example in the post…you can be real & +ve @ the same time.
    I find that 99.99% of the time the -ve ish ppl have to say to you in an attempt to destroy you is really what the person thinks of themselves…..

  13. “but..alot of people don’t know what that thang thang is…and i bet 50 million bucks that if the hater could find it..the hate would stop. cause harnessing your own “thang” takes all the time out of hating on someone else.”

    Comeback: Very well said chica… I agree.

    “The prophetic Andre 3000, once wrote “If you say real talk, I probably dont trust you””

    Peyso: I never heard that quote, but I think I’ll have to agree… it’s kinda like someone who has to preface a statement with “I don’t mean to be nasty but…” because nine times out of 10, they are saying something straight up mean.

    “They don’t like themselves that’s why they hate on everything”

    Jazz: Very good point here!

    “Case in point … I recently had to tell someone “Your broke” … and it was no hating … just a real and pessimistic analysis of their cash flow.”

    SBM: I don’t know why this made me erupt in a fit of giggles.

    B&TT: First of all welcome to the site!!!!! I’m so glad you like it. You are so right, distance yourself from a phony. No need to hang on to an unfruitful friendship!


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