Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

That 50/50 Love March 3, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — FlawedBeauty @ 2:27 am

So…I had written a whole other post for the day, BUT after some conversations with “friends” tonight I changed my mind.

Every one knows that there are two people in a relationship (unless you’re on some freakiness)…anyways…sometimes one person gives more than the other.

Example #1-John and Tyra (which I think are a real couple) each work 40 hours a week.  Everyday John comes home and eats a home cooked meal, drinks a beer, and then watches tv until bedtime when he gives Tyra the “shoulder tap”.  Tyra shrugs him off and says she is not the mood because she has worked, cooked, put the kids to bed, and cleaned the house.  John doesn’t understand this because hey he’s worked too.  (This is about 80/20 in her favor if even that)

Example #2-Max and Lauren who live in a lovely suburban neighborhood and have 2 kids.  Max works an average of 65 hours a week, comes home to a messy house and dirty kids.  Lauren spends her time at the gym, salon and spa.  They constantly fight because he wants to have the suburban life and she’s only interested in herself.  (I don’t even know if I can see where she’s giving)

Example #3-Sean and Emma live right next door to Max and Lauren.  They have 4 kids all under the age of 10.  Sean is the primary breadwinner and Emma works a part time job (for her own personal spending money).  Emma is sure to keep the inside of the house clean and the kids neat and orderly.  Sean takes out the trash and makes sure the lawn is clean etc.  (This is 50/50…you can read into this a little more)

So ladies and gents-have you ever had a relationship where you felt you were giving too much?  Not enough? OR that you two were meeting in the middle?

What are some tips (from both sides of course) that would help a relationship move with more ease?


7 Responses to “That 50/50 Love”

  1. In the majority of my relationships, I’ve given more. I’ve learned that some guys think that if they are giving you money and paying bills, that will make up for the lack of love. While nice, it’s not true… especially since I don’t require a man to pay my bills.

    Communication and friendship helps a relationship move with more ease.

  2. I think that 50/50 ratio is harder to define when you don’t live together. I think I’ve been in a couple relationships where I didn’t give my fair share. It was just a sign that I didn’t really want the relationship to last.

  3. thecomebackgirl Says:

    In the past I’ve given more too. Ideally both people should be giving more..even if 50/50 doesn’t exist..(because it doesn’t). More just is my effort and I’m willing to show you I care. That could mean that if a man knows you working late one night, he tries to cook, or better yet orders out so you both eat well that night.

  4. 100/100 is more like it. If you’re not giving it your full effort, then what’s the point?

    in both cases of 1 & 2, they would have gotten the “next”

  5. peyso Says:

    100/100 equal 50/50 of total effort. The first couple the dude is a jerk, the second couple the jawn is a jerk, the third couple is like the baby bear, just right.

  6. Jaci Says:

    Whyso-Why do I always find myself agreeing with you and the stuff you say. I think if you’re in the right relationship you will want to give 100% of your best to that person. Does that make sense to anyone other than me?

    What do you guys think are some ways in which you can effectively ask your mate to give more or that would work with you?

  7. Kay Says:

    Everyone is looking for example #3. I don’t want to feel like I’m doing too much. And I don’t want to feel like he’s doing to much. Being 50/50 is so much easier.

    I also wouldn’t like to feel so tired that I can’t make love to my other half. I feel that’s why men wonder. I’m not saying that women cause it it, but you wouldn’t want to find out that’s the reason.

    I’m very big on family bonding. I’d like to know that we’re both there for the kids instead of taking shifts. I want us all to sit at the table talking to the kids while eating dinner. Sounds like a suburban life but, it must be done to stay connected in your family. I sure wish my parents did that rather than letting us eat dinner in our room or in front of the TV.

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