Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

Interracial Dating and Disney April 30, 2009

Filed under: Single Sisters On... — FlawedBeauty @ 12:49 am
Wherefore Art Thou?

Wherefore Art Thou?

Later this year, Disney plans to release its first animated musical featuring a black princess, ”The Princess and the Frog.” Even lthough Disney is taking a big, albeit late, step by creating its first black princess, the project hasn’t been without controversy. First, Disney changed the heroine’s name to Tiana from Maddy, a stereotypical slave name. Then, the producers changed her profession from chambermaid to restaurant entrepreneur. Now, people are up in arms because Princess Tiana’s love interest, Prince Naveen, looks white. He’s described as having olive-toned skin and a slight Spanish accent—because he’s voiced by Brazilian actor Bruno Campos. Could it be that Disney, which has a history of marginalizing blacks, is actually promoting interracial dating?

Blogger James Collier theorizes about Disney’s motives for making the prince non-black: “Disney does not want the future mothers of dwindling white America being imprinted so early in their lives with the notion of a black suitor.” Others think Disney has deemed black-on-black love as unmarketable to little white girls. Given Disney’s history of omitting blacks from its projects, these theories are plausible explanations. But I doubt Disney held meetings in which they plotted to keep blacks with blacks and whites with whites. Or am I naive?

When I wrote about “The Princess and the Frog” back in February, I did notice that the prince was an ambiguous Disney brown. You know, the brown color Disney uses when it wants the character to be brown, but not too brown. Since I couldn’t tell for sure what color he was, I did something that I did as a child when I played with my Barbies or watched “The Simpsons”—I made him whatever color I wanted him to be. And I think most children will do this while watching the movie.

Ultimately, interracial loving shouldn’t be an issue. His name is of Hindi and Indian origin. New Orleans, the setting for the movie-musical, has a lengthy history of interracial relationships. And actor Campoa could very well have a little black in him—since Brazil has the largest black population outside of Africa. The uproar over the prince’s perceived race is ridiculous. No one was upset when Pocahontas hooked up with Englishman John Smith because that had some basis in history. Well, some black women date outside their race. And if white women didn’t date black men from time to time, we wouldn’t have a President. But look at it this way: Disney already had an inter-species relationship in “The Little Mermaid,” so why not let Princess Tiana hook up with a prince who isn’t as brown as she is? []

So fellow bloggers, how do you feel about this topic?  Do you think it will hurt children?  Did you envision Disney characters as your own race or did you see them for who and what they were?   Do you think Disney is making a mistake?  Let me know people!


Angels and Demons April 28, 2009

Filed under: Chicken Soup for the Soul,Single Sisters On... — cuzzo @ 11:01 pm

The feeling is real. It’s not a nightmare. The first time it happened to me, I KNEW I must have done something right. I confessed with my mouth that I live because of Jesus. I believed that only He could redeem me. And if not that same night, then soon after, strange things began to happen – scary things. As I laid, it felt like something was on me, on my back, just there. I couldn’t wake up. With my eyes tightly closed, I prayed the Lord’s Prayer – over and over. It became more intense, like whatever it was, was now trying to touch my hair. I felt that – my body, my mind, acknowledged this movement.

It still happens, not often, and in different ways. The other night, the presence (no longer on my back…just there), was around again. Too intense to be a nightmare. Was I awake? Did I yell out? I felt like I was praying out loud. I felt like I was shouting…was I? I’m not the only person this has happened to. But, does this only happen to Christians? I am by far not bible quoting, judgmental Super Christian – so why?

When it happened the first time, my friend and her mom came and prayed over my apartment. I’ve since slacked off on the praying over my son’s crib and my bedroom every night. Even when I prayed those nights, the presence was still there – not like a “ghost” but a demon. There were nights when I just prayed and prayed – eyes closed, either because I could not wake or didn’t want to. I’m not scared that any demon will do anything to me – they are not greater than God. But, man o man, does it mess with my sleep.

Do you have any knowledge of this activity? Has it happened to you? A friend or family member?

I share this because I know it is happening to people…we are all connected. Annnnd because I bring the Kimfoolery and like to quote stuff, where’s this from:

“The only spooks I’m scared of are the ones with guns.”


Anyone but them….. April 27, 2009

Filed under: Single Sisters On... — peyso @ 9:44 pm




I’ve been totally swamped for the last three weeks. I mean between work and LSAT prep (180 here I come) I’ve barely had enough time to comment. I’ve noticed that this has created a level of stress that I have never felt before. This stress causes me to think of the most ludicrous, outlandish things whenever I get a free moment. The other day I was driving home and I literally thought that I was seeing people on the highway (this one might have been caused by the benedryl mixed with a drink from a Chinese bar called “Liquid Marijuana”) I’ve pondered what wild animals I could fight (btw I think I could beat a tiger or a lion if I had a baseball bat). Most recently, I thought what two celebrities I would not want to be locked in a cell with and here are the people that I came up with:



First, I’ll start with Ron Artest. During his rookie season with the Chicago Bulls, he was the subject of criticism for applying for a job at Circuit City, just to get an employee discount. To make things worse, Ron Artest used his coach and the owner as a reference. He was suspended for two games in the early 2004-05 season by Pacers coach Rick Carlisle after he allegedly asked for a month off because he was tired from promoting an R&B album for the group Allure on his production label. Artest had also been suspended for three games in 2003 for destroying a television camera in Madison Square Garden, and f or four games for a confrontation with Miami Heat coach Pat Riley in 2003. I won’t even get into the incident where he decided to beat up the fans.

Here are his most famous quotes:

“I told him if he leaves, then I’m going to kill him. Unless he wants to die, he’s got to stay.”- referring to former team mate Bonzi Wells


Reporter: Why did you apply at Best Buy?”

Artest: “Because you get discounts, home theatres dont come cheap man”

“I didn’t hold up no middle fingers. My middle finger is crooked so it sticks out. Maybe that’s what was showing.” 

“They better not put me in the All-Star Game. I won’t shoot, but I’ll dominate that easy game. I’ll be playing hard defense. I’ll be foulin’. I’ll be flagrant fouling. Everyone will be like, ‘What are you doing?'” —

Ron Artest. As a teenager, Ron Artest played in an AAU Tournament, got angry and knocked over two water coolers. He then told his coach, “I don’t know what’s wrong with those buckets.



I’m not even going to try to describe Tyson’s crazy arse. I’ll just let you read his quotes. He’s easily the king of this crazy quotable sh*t. Jamie Foxx described Tyson as being a pit bull on leash. If Tyson came in the room right now, kneegrows might start running.

“[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse?

On Lennox Lewis

“Lennox Lewis, I’m coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I’m just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!”

“My main objective is to be professional but to kill him.”

“I want to rip out his heart and feed it to him [Lennox Lewis]. I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children.”

On Razor Ruddock “You’re sweet. I’m going to make sure you kiss me good with those big lips. I’m gonna make you my girlfriend.”

On His Former Wife, Robin Givens

“I paid a worker at New York’s zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin. When we got to the gorilla cage there was 1 big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let smash that silverback’s snotbox! He declined.”

“Anyone with a grain of sense would know that if I punched my wife I would rip her head off. It’s all lies. I have never laid a finger on her.”

On His Childhood

“One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like a infantile retard.”


On Fans

“There are nine million people who see me in the ring and hate my guts. Most of them are white. That’s okay. Just spell my name right.”

“I think the average person thinks I’m a f**king nut and I deserve whatever happens to me. That’s what I believe.”

“When you see me smash somebody’s skull, you enjoy it.”


On Boxing

“I try to catch him right on the tip of the nose, because I try to push the bone into the brain.”

“How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They’re just as good as dead.”

“My power is discombobulatingly devastating I could feel is muscle tissues collapse under my force. It’s ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm.”

Tyson: “It’s interesting that you put me in the league with those illustrious fighters [Muhammad Ali, Joe Louis, Jack Johnson], but I’ve proved since my career I’ve surpassed them as far my popularity. I’m the biggest fighter in the history of the sport. If you don’t believe it, check the cash register.”

“I just want them to keep bringing guys on and I’m going to strip them of their health. I bring pain, a lot of pain.” O

n the Media “I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.?

[To a female reporter] “It’s no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don’t do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn’t talk anymore… Unless you want to, you know.”

“People [are] going to say what they say. It has to be for a reason. It’s just for a reason. I know sometimes I say things; I offend people. I ask this lady a lewd question because I’m in a lot of pain too. I have some pain I’m gonna have for the rest of my life. And Lewis, I’m trying to give some of that pain to ya’ll.”

“If I take this camera and put it in your face for 20 years, I don’t know what you might be. You might be a homosexual if I put that camera on you since you were 13 years old. I’ve been on that camera since I was 13 years old.”

On Religion “All praise is to Allah, I’ll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I’d fight him too.”


On Himself

“I’m just like you. I enjoy the forbidden fruits in life, too. I think it’s un-American not to go out with a woman, not to be with a beautiful woman, not to get my **** sucked … It’s just what I said before, everybody in this country is a big f**king liar. [The media] tells people … that this person did this and this person did that and then we find out that were just human and we find out that Michael Jordan cheats on his wife just like everybody else and that we all cheat on our f**king wife in one way or another either emotionally, physically or sexually or one way.”

“At times, I come across as crude or crass, that irritates you when I come across like a Neanderthal or a babbling idiot at times. But I like to be that person. I like to show you all that person because that’s who you come to see.”

“I’m the most irresponsible person in the world. The reason I’m like that is because, at 21, you all gave me $50 or $100 million, and I didn’t know what to do. I’m from the ghetto. I don’t know how to act. One day I’m in a dope house robbing somebody. The next thing I know, ‘You’re the heavyweight champion of the world.’ … Who am I? What am I? I don’t even know who I am. I’m just a dumb child. I’m being abused. I’m being robbed by lawyers. I think I have more money than I do. I’m just a dumb pugnacious fool. I’m just a fool who thinks I’m someone. And you tell me I should be responsible?”

On America

“I’m just a dark guy from a den of iniquity. A dark shadowy figure from the bowels of iniquity. I wish I could be Mike who gets an endorsement deal. But you can’t make a lie and a truth go together. This country wasn’t built on moral fiber. This country was built on rape, slavery, murder, degradation and affiliation with crime.”

Miscellaneous Quotes

“I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating.”

“I just want to conquer people and their souls.”


Is there anyone that you would literally be afraid to be in a prison cell with? And on a slightly connected note, what do you do to relieve stress?


LOVE April 26, 2009

Filed under: Dating,relationships,Single Sisters On... — Sunny @ 10:00 pm

I don’t know if I know anything about love.  I recall the first time I said it.  I was around twenty years old and the guy was my first boyfriend, who I eventually forfeited my virginity to. 

We were lying on a blanket in a big open park, looking at the stars.  I remember blurting it out but I cannot recall what triggered it.  I remember him not saying it back right away, which I was okay with.  (He ended up saying it back later that night though.)  During the time we were together, I felt like this was for real. We planned our future together, he designed our dream home.  We were going to wait until marriage to have our first sexual encounter (but it was eventually lost while we were watching “Life.”  How romantic! Lol). 

Imagine my surprise when one day out of the blue, he disappeared for over a month.  He called me one day and broke up with me.  It took me three years to finally get over him and it wasn’t until years later (just October of 2008) that we even crossed paths again.  He told me that he was scared of loving me and didn’t know how to handle those emotions – and he apologized.  I told him that was water under the bridge and that was that.  Hey, everyone has to experience at least one heart break in life, right?

But am I confused, did I really love him?  Seems like you should know what made you tell someone you love them.

Mr. Threesome (which I’ve talked about many times on here) told me he loved me out the blue one day – completely random.  I said it back but I can’t say that I was in love.

I love easy- shoot, I have love for the sandwich makers at Calistoga.  I am an extremely caring person (although I may not always seem to wear that on my sleeve), and to me- if I care what happens to you, I must love you.


I know there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with them.  How do you know when have entered the realm of the latter?  Does the world really stop?  Do you hear a voice telling you?

Does it feel like this:

Is there love at first sight?  Is there a time limit on love?  How soon do you feel it? What if you love someone right away?  When do you tell them? What if they think you are a psycho?   

Does love ever run out?  Is love enough to build a relationship on? 

I know I’m asking a ton of questions but I am clueless about this thing. 

Please enlighten me and share your experiences.



Is He/She The Prototype April 24, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Holly GoLightly @ 8:36 am

Sorry for the delay had some technical difficulties but back to our regular scheduled program…… 🙂

For some reason I receive eHarmony emails and I really never questioned it or read them but for reason, most likely out of boredom, I actually read this particular email. One of the advice articles titled, 9 Signs You’ve Met The One, really caught my eye and caused me to question the relationship I have with Bail bondsman and whether I considered him “The One” or not. Of course I won’t divulge my conclusion just yet because some days I do think he is and some days I don’t just depends on the time of the month and the temperature outside!

According to eHarmony, the 9 signs that you’ve met your match are:

1) You’re Not Chasing the Relationship’s Potential

Many people have romantic relationships fraught with obstacles. On a basic level, the relationship is satisfactory, but there always seems to be something standing in the way of true happiness: a stressful job, an annoying ex, a distasteful habit. Both people feel that once the obstacle is removed, they’ll be truly content together.

Unfortunately, relationships don’t work that way. Once the problem is resolved, another one pops up. And—surprise!—the couple is still unhappy.

What people may not realize is that if they are waiting for true happiness in their relationship, then they are in the wrong relationship. Landing a better job may make life easier financially, but no amount of money will help two people who just aren’t a good fit for each other.

The truth is, a happy, well-adjusted couple doesn’t have to chase what could be or should be. A good relationship just is.

2) Who You Are Is Good Enough

You know you’ve met the one when your partner loves you for who you are. We know it sounds pretty cliché, but like all clichés, it’s true. “The One’s” admiration of you is so powerful that it’s almost as if he or she is awestruck by your very presence. He takes great pride in the choices you’ve made. She finds you smart, sexy, fun to be with, and so on. You never have to try to impress “The One” because you’ve already done that by just being you.

3) You Manage Conflict Well

Let’s say we have two couples that have been together for the same amount of time. Couple A fights regularly. Couple B has never argued in the history of their relationship. Which couple do you think a relationship counselor would say is at greater risk?

That’s right: Couple B. Upon closer examination, you’ll find that someone in the relationship—perhaps both parties—isn’t being forthcoming. Someone’s needs and wants aren’t being voiced and therefore aren’t being addressed.

Couple A, on the other hand, makes it a point to bring up topics that are bothersome or dissatisfying within the relationship. This couple regularly engages in respectful, healthy conflict—without insults or throwing things—and comes out the other side a stronger couple that gains a deeper understanding of one another with each conflict they resolve together. How much a couple fights isn’t the issue, unless they don’t fight at all. It’s how a couple manages conflicts that determines how well the relationship works.

4) The Mundane Is Suddenly Interesting

If you’re spending time with someone who really is “The One,” then you probably want to pay attention to even the smallest details of his or her life. Specifics from his work interest you, stories about his childhood hold your attention, and even old photos or home movies fascinate you.

When this happens, then this person is likely much more to you than a ship passing in the night.

5) There’s Minimal Drama—or None at All

Like we said above when we talked about conflict, even the healthiest relationships deal with their share of arguments. So when we say that there’s not a lot of drama in your relationship, we don’t mean that the two of you never fight.

But when you do, you do your best to fight fair. You admit when you’re wrong, you listen to each other, you acknowledge one another’s good points, and you apologize when you cross lines. It’s not that you have to be perfect, but if this person is “The One,” then you are at least trying to make your conflict work for your relationship rather than against it.

So if you two are dealing with constant drama, where one of you is trying to create high emotions to manipulate the other or where there’s constant turbulence without some sort of resolution, then be careful about fully committing to the relationship at this point. High drama is a definite red flag when it comes to long-term relationship success.

6) Your Friends and Family See What You See

If the people who love you the most are begging you to get away from someone, then that person’s probably not the one for you. On the other hand, if the people you trust also see what you see in this person and encourage the relationship, then that’s a good sign that you two may belong together.

Of course, sometimes your friends and family may choose someone for you whom you haven’t chosen. They may push for a relationship that you have no interest in pursuing. In these cases, it’s not always wise to follow their advice.

But if you’re falling in love with someone whom the people in your life want you to be with, then there’s a good chance that this may be the real deal.

7) You Know How to Make Them Happy

When there’s a deep connection between two people, they each know what the other wants and needs. So ask yourself this question about the person in your life: Do you know what it takes to make him or her happy? Think about minor, moment-by-moment issues, like where that person likes to eat and what kind of back rub he or she enjoys.

Additionally, think about larger matters as well: Do you know how to help her relieve stress? Can you get her to talk about her dreams and visions for the future? When she’s struggling at work or with a family issue, can you help her come through the storm and find the sun again? And, just as important, does your partner know how to do this for you as well? If so, that’s another reason to believe that you’ve found “The One.”

8 ) You Have the Same Life Priorities

Opposites may attract, but they rarely make for a good long-term relationship. Compatibility really is key when it comes to creating a deep and lasting connection between two people.

For example, if you want to begin preparing for the future and building toward certain life and career goals, but your partner mainly wants to make enough money so that he or she can party this weekend, then you two are probably working with fairly different priorities.

And the opposite it is true, too: If your priorities match up well, then you two have a much better chance of long-term happiness and fulfillment together.

9) You Respect the Person Deeply

Mutual respect is crucial for a healthy relationship. Without that respect, there’s simply no way to create and build a secure foundation so that you can enjoy all of the benefits of a deep and strong relationship.

But when you respect your partner and he or she respects you, the relationship has a strong chance at thriving, and all the aspects of your connection blossom. The communication improves. The commitment deepens. The trust multiplies. The satisfaction level goes through the roof.

And that all begins with a mutual respect that emerges because you like each other and because you appreciate the way you live your individual lives.

So as you try to figure out whether you’ve found “The One,” take a look at this list. If you can check off each of the above items, then you owe it to yourself to allow the relationship to become all that it can possibly be.


Video MADE the Radio Star April 23, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — Sunny @ 6:28 am

I love music.  When I’m getting ready for work in the morning, at the crack of dawn, when normal people are still sleeping, I keep the channel tuned onto VH-1.  This channel plays a lot of different videos that you normally don’t see during the day.  I dunno, maybe it’s a marketing thing.

Anywho, durning the early morning hours, I’ve been exposed to some songs that I normally wouldn’t give a second thought to.  Some of these videos are soo good that they have made me love the song…. video  does not always ‘kill the radio star.”  Some of my favs are below.  I’m heated that some of the links had embedding disabled, but please, check them out! 

Chester French, \”She Loves Everybody\”



Gabriella Cilmi, \”Sweet About Me\”


N.E.R.D, \”Sooner or Later\”

I am a N.E.R.D ryda’, (lol) but this song honestly didn’t become one of my favorites until I saw the video.

Do any of you have any of these songs?


No Ifs, Ands, or Butts About It April 22, 2009

Filed under: Community Issues,Kimfoolery,Music — cuzzo @ 2:18 am

Since the dawn of time, it’s no secret that the black man has loved a full, round posterior on a woman. So much so that some of them tend to get the uncontrollable urge to turn their heads (and sometimes bodies) a full 180 degrees to catch a glimpse of one. They have had full on debates about the different shapes of the gluteus maximus – apparently they’ve come up with names such as the “onion” and the “teardrop” booty. They have even made songs such as “Baby Got Back” and “She Got A Donk”, to show their appreciation for a woman’s rear curvature. And women further entertain the vision with dances like the “uh oh” and movements like the “booty clap”.

I think all of this backside loving has spilled over into the women’s subconscious. I’ve caught myself looking at my butt in the mirror and trying to exercise the kind of control that allows you to flex each cheek. Kind of like what guys do when they have ginormous pecs. I like to look for it’s reflection almost every chance I get while walking the street. And although it does make some men say “got damn (it’s a new day)”, I’m thankful I do not have the lip-biting, jab your friend with your elbow and say looklooklooklooklooklooklook kinda booty. How some women walk around looking like they are smuggling two midgets in their back pockets, I do not know. I’d hate THAT MUCH attention. Sometimes a whole heap (extend the “he”, emphasis on the “p”) just looks STANK (for lack of better words) or even painful to have. I have been guilty of furrowing my brow and Miss Wrap O’ Round Ass, frowning, laughing and pointing, carrying on and what not. Maybe that’s the kid in me.

There are some women that as they walk towards you can tell, they will have a fatty. But fellas, oh the fellas, God bless their hearts, MUST (as stated above) confirm this with the head turn, and in extreme cases, an extension of a statement of the obvious. In my times of people watching, I can always bet that a man will turn his head and I laugh (or shake my head) at the method.

We have the Corporate America – this is when a man waits several seconds until the woman has passed and fakes a look at his watch and then turns his head as if he’s looking for someone behind him. He doesn’t look too long.

The Thirsty Larry – now Larry can be with his momma, the pastor from his church, his kids, and he will stop whatever it is he is doing/saying and move the person to the side and have a full-out stare down.

The Disconbobulated – this kind of look will have a dude crash into passers by and anything else for that matter because he is having a lengthy look at a woman while trying to walk in the opposite direction – look out for him, he is dangerous.

The Closer – this happens in close quarters, like an elevator, and as the woman exits and the booty is seen for the first time. The closer also gives you a reaction like an “mmm”, or a full out “damn, she got a fat @ss” (imagine how I came up with this one).

The Huh? – this happens when a woman catches the man looking as she turns back towards him possibly to say something and all you get is a huh? say that again, because he couldn’t hear you over the inaudible noise your booty made.

Do we have any other types of looks? Additions to the fascination of the female buttocks? Favorite “Shake Som’in” (in a soldier boy voice) song?

In other news, a nice posterior has helped the buttherheads of America – and not just a nice posterior but in the right proportions.

*In other other news, my post two weeks ago, Nice Guys Need Not Apply, proved theraputic – though I did not intend on it. I thought about the foolishness I was putting myself through and dumped the zero and got with the hero, as they used to say back in the days of jenny jones and ricki lake.*