***You guys get to hear from me again today- How lucky you are! kidding. But on a serious note, Jaci is at her cousin’s funeral today, so I’m writing for her. Please keep her and her family in your prayers. Thanks***
Taking a cue from TMCY, I’m writing this letter to my cousin. I’m sick of her b&tching about her new husband.
Hey, it’s me. How are the kids? Great. We’re only a couple of years apart and have been close all of our lives, so I feel like I can be candid with you. Can I- for just a second? Great.
So. I feel the need to write you this letter because you just got married in March and you’ve been griping about your husband just about every week since then. Thing is, everything you are complaining about are all things you knew about when you first got married.
You knew he wasn’t very romantic. I noticed after I told you about the flowers J had surprised me with at home (I wasn’t bragging- I was just excited. ), the very next day you started a fight with your husband about him not being romantic. Well, doll, you knew this. This is the same man who doesn’t want to take you out on the weekends just because “he doesn’t want to;” the same man who bought you a whole gang of items from the Dollar Store for Christmas because he believes in gift quantity and not quality; and the same guy that comes home from work and leaves a trail of clothes from the front of the door to the couch, where he plops down to watch Sports Center until work the next morning (yes, I do think it’s strange that you guys are not sleeping together. You guys should still be in marital bliss.)
You complain about him being selfish. Ma’am, once again= Same guy before marriage and after marriage. Same thing with him lacking initiative. Hell, he didn’t even have initiative when planning the wedding. You were actually planning the wedding before he was engaged to you. This leads me to believe perhaps you pushed him. Sure, it’s probably his fault because he should have manned up and told you that he wasn’t ready to get married but I believe you probably knew he wasn’t going to do that. He really doesn’t have any better offers coming in, so why would he risk losing you?
I think this is just one of these situations that you’ve gotten yourself in since we’ve been kids. I’ve watched you jump from relationship to relationship. You have been engaged at least four times (if I haven’t lost count) and married once prior to this one. You were planning weddings when we still should have been playing double dutch. None of these ninjas treated you like the queen you are and you never demanded it.
After seeing a therapist, he named your “condition” co-dependent personality. And silly girl, you thought that because he named it, it made it okay. No ma’am it does not. I wish you would’ve took the time to correct this problem.
I just pray for your two beautiful little girls. I really worry that they are headed in this direction. I saw it that time I was on the phone with you and had to hear one of them cry forEVER because their “daddy” went to play basketball instead of coming home. I’ m not saying I’m “…The Best”, like Drake may have you to believe, but I really think it’s up to me to help show them that there is another way.
Please think about this.
*** Alright now, any comments about my letter? Possible ways she’d respond? Is there anyone in your family like her or who you’d like to write a letter to? ***