In case you were not aware, aside from rainbows, sunshine, lollipops, and love, it takes money to raise a child. Family Court is where you can make a deadbeat (or proposed deadbeat) cut the check…legally, of course (there are other ways that may involve Uncle Tony and a series of beatdowns but we’re not that kinda crowd now, are we?). And as with any governmental system, there are it’s abusers which make it lame and hard for those that really need the help.
A woman needs to do what’s necessary to at least try to ensure that both parties are taking care of their responsibilities. Some men (whether or not physically remaining in the child’s life) voluntarily give child support whether it be a stipend or providing on an as needed basis. Some men have their good intentions, coulda, shoulda woulda stories but never come through. Coulda, shoulda, woulda, doesn’t make for a steady cash flow. Imagine if your job started saying uh, “I will gladly pay you Tuesday, for a hamburger today?” Aw, hells no. Unacceptable.
Some woman are immediately in the court, asking for everything except he kitchen sink, plus custody. Woah, Nelly! You should at least make an attempt to have an agreement before going to court of the way things need to be in order to support the child. And, when you’ve exhausted time, breath, and energy for money (ie. he’s not coming through at all or consistently), take his butt to court. When you make enough money, some men feel like, you’re cool, you got this…no fool, you gonna have this too. It’s the princibalities of it all.
All in all, child support is a good thing 🙂
What do you think of child support? Good, bad, evil and unnecessary? Yay – too many deadbeats? Nay – too many golddiggers? Circumstances…stories…you giving? You receiving?
I receive and have the “coulda, shoulda, woulda” negro to thank for that. My bottom line was do what you say you are going to do and we don’t have to go there. So, guess what happened? There we were…and we’re going back.
There’s a simple law/rule/creed the U.S government has placed on passports for children:
1) To leave the country, a child must have a passport, no matter the age – 1 day old and up.
2) Both parents must sign off on this.
Their options are a) both parents show up to the office together to submit the application b) an addendum for the absent parent must be signed and notarized giving the permission to the other parent to obtain the passport c) a parent has sole custody and doesn’t need the other parent to sign anything. *This was put in place so that it wouldn’t be easy for one parent to just up and take the child to another country and say sayonara.* (and to FORCE communication between two people that would otherwise not be speaking…hmph) Trying to do it without the addendum (even though they do have an area where you are supposed to explain why you can’t obtain the other parents signature) is fruitless. They want you to “exhaust all efforts” to obtain the signature and prove it. How the heck do you prove that you’ve called, text, sent letters, smoke signals…and each time, got the okey doke or no response? And, cannot locate, doesn’t work either. Which then forces you to GO THERE (which is where we have to go because guess what? One year and half later and still no OK on a piece of paper) – sole custody. Sole custody is nothing to wince at however, because you wouldn’t want someone that hasn’t been in your child’s life to then in 10 years come back and try to take over. It’s to protect the child.
YOU have no rights to YOUR child, until YOU establish them in court. By rights, I mean legal custody – the right to make decisions for your child, physical custody – the right to obtain your child, partial or shared custody – both parents share rights equally, etc.