Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

Suffer The Little Children or Little Children Should Suffer? September 29, 2009

Filed under: Single Sisters On... — FlawedBeauty @ 10:45 pm
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The events of last Thursday afternoon in Chicago shock me. (click here for the story and video)

They don’t shock me because I’m ignorant or unaware of my surroundings they shock me because of the realization I came upon after a lot of thought:

The children are depending on us.

Now, I don’t have any children & if I did I’d be scared…I would be scared if my son were five minutes late home from school. I’d be scared if my daughter felt pressure to lose 10lbs. but if I am the right kinda mother none of these things will matter. Maybe.

But what if I have to stay late at work and the TV raises my kids a little for me? Or what if someone convinces my kids that I know nothing? Come on, admit it…we’re all guilty of thinking our parents are the dumbest people alive. As I’ve gotten older (and I thank God with good reason I’ve made it this far) I realize my parents are geniuses. They are genuises because they’re 60. They are genuises because they have raised a child who accurately knows right from wrong & frequently shows it. They are geniuses because they’ve of themselves to make sure young men & women (even other than me can make it).

And all of this is really to say on these blogs we talk about se!x, relationships, politics…adult things that are serious & that matter to us. Last week we had an emergency black blog renaissance meeting where we discussed improvements that could be made in the black blog arena, but what about a black community renaissance? Honestly, I could not give a crap…but I do.  Once upon a time we were the future…the future is now and the generations before and after us are depending on the decisions we make right now.  Derrion could have been your brother or your cousin or even your son. Those children who senselessly did this to him could be that kid you see walking the streets when they should be at school.

The problem is we’re not doing enough as responsible adults to stop the epidemic that is robbing our young men & women of their lives. And yeah, you might feel that you don’t have kids so it doesn’t matter…that’s not true. It’s about accountability. It’s about logic. It’s about love.

The solution to the problem isn’t say well Daley should do better or Barack should go home and speak. Charity begins at home…not school and definitely not at a Presidential rally. We need to support our children and love them instead of degrading them or labeling them. We have been sent great treasures, yet they are not treasured and therefore do not know how to treasure others. That’s how we lose our bright stars like Derrion. One mother will bury her child. And it’s possible that two others will bury theirs too…and all because there didn’t have hands to stand on. My hands have a little of this boys blood on them and I know this…but I’m gonna wash it off and hug a child, read a book and have some long conversations.
Ladies and gentlemen, how do you feel about this situation? Do we feel we are failing our children? As a result do you feel we are failing ourselves? What, if anything, are you going to do to help a child or develop your community so this won’t happen?

Also if you would like to send condolences to the family of Derrion Albert you may send them to the following: The Family  of Derrion Albert C/O Pleasant Hill Baptist Church, 7950 S. Normal, Chicago, IL 60620


11 Responses to “Suffer The Little Children or Little Children Should Suffer?”

  1. I think all things start at home.. As I discussed on Rob’s blog, something is lacking at home where these kids feel like they can go out and commit heinous acts.

    We, as a community can help reinforce good behavior, but that really means nothing if a child is going home to an unstable situation.

    I am now volunteering for a program for high school girls. I pray that I can help our young women.

  2. peyso Says:

    I think its easy to say that something is missing at home. Home is a factor but it aint the only thing. There is alot of sh!t going on in the hood that either we forget about or have been fortunate enough not to experience. I know people who are hardened criminals who have siblings who grew up in the same house and went to college and made something with themselves. It aint all the home life, it aint all a lack of opportunities. I think we need to stop trying to lump everything together so that we cna understand it. Some violence happens b/c of broken homes, some b/c of lack of respect for humanity, some are lil BS getting out of hand and I say this to say that there is a varied amount of reasons.

    I think the Derrion Albert is a very interesting situation. Fights like those have happened since my father was in high school. I firmly believed that they werent out to kill him or anyone else. Especially considering with what ease folks can get guns. I’ve been jumped and I’ve jumped folks so I know firsthand how a mob mentality works.

    I’ve always worked to show children all of their opportunities. I brought at least 60 kids a year to my school to see that a n99a from the projects can make it out.

  3. enyfilms Says:

    I have nothing to add here living where I do two dudes were killed in my projects over the weekend barely any (Linden and the other adjacent one Blvd houses)news coverage .

    Plus 2Pac on his “Me Against the World” lp did a track around the same nonsense in the same city.

    Depending on when some of yall really got into hip hop the whole incident may be a new story or the details are now all forgotten. But Robert “Yummie” Sandford (pls google it) was killed (btw he was 11) by gang members I think they thought or maybe he did “snitch” point is his killers were about his age or a few years young, I was 21. Same reaction now as then and I assume like then once the weekend hits NO ONE will do anything different come Monday even if over the weekend in one of those spots we love to be at something goes down, nothing I mean nothing stops young black ppl from gettin our party on and neither will this. Carry on.

  4. peyso Says:

    @ enyfilms – was one of them on stanley and schenck? I heard it was a like 23yo PR dude

  5. I definitely believe I’m failing the children in my family and community. Just because I know the “right” way to live, I know some beneficial things to share, but I choose not to. Mostly because I’m selfish. I feel like since I don’t have any children, I’m not responsible. On the other hand, in some way, we’re all responsible. Because these kids on the block will be my neighbors one day.

    I agree, parents need to be there, but if they’re not, and you and I know they’re not….then the responsibilty starts to spread to us. Most of us who are pretty good people were not just raised by our parents. We had uncles, mentors, aunts, old folks down the street, etc…. they all helped us along.

  6. enyfilms Says:

    @ peyso, yezzir 640 Stanley Ave and the othe in blvd projects was on Stanley, The East unlike Jay Z’s old hood(which I am twenty min from, A train to utica ave) aint seein none of that gentrification or bougie chi chi change, broke workin ppl and unemployed negro’s!

  7. V Renee Says:

    I’m all sorts of tardy to the party. I just watched the video of them beating that boy and cried.

    I’m so scared to have kids….especially boys. I try not to be cynical, but this is a scary world around us. And it’s even scarier to me, because I feel like there isn’t a real solution. It sounds sooo pessimistic, and I hate that I feel like that. But I do. I also feel like people who don’t need/deserve kids (yeah I know, who am I to decide who deserves kids) are the ones having them.

  8. Eightys Baby Says:

    Anywho in regards to the topic…. It’s just sad all the way around….. A lot of the younger generation seems so lost to me…. I have a younger cousin who just does not have it together.. But I feel like I walk on egg shells with her because I don’t want to push her away by overstepping my boundaries..She knows I’m there for her but it’s so much more I could be saying to her but I don’t want her to lose her…

    It’s definitely gonna be a battle but WE have got to step up to do more.. I know within my hometown I make myself visible to the younger girls and approachable but I need to do more.

    I’m all sorts of tardy to the party. I just watched the video of them beating that boy and cried.

    @V…. I couldn’t dare watch that video… To be honest I don’t even know how I feel about them releasing it….. I’m thinking about that boys family…. They don’t want to see that…

  9. being from chicago, this story is way to real. but violence in our communities isn’t new. we all have stories that we can share. i think the degree of the violence, random nature of violence and how it is specifically youth related in chicago is what is scary. it’s beyond out of control.

    in watching the video, the fighting and gang activity isn’t normal. 2×4’s and railroad ties and sticks and brick and bottle usage amongst youth violence is shocking. this isn’t just a fist and feet fight. if it was, he probably would have survived.

    @peyso, it isn’t all a product of “home”, but that is where it starts. and it starts there early than people can even image. you start developing your senses regarding violence at very young ages. . . i’m talking 2’s and 3’s. let’s say i am super-mentor (which I’m not), spending 20 hours a week with children in these communities and situations, you usually don’t get to them till their like 10+. which means the goings on of the community and home life have had a 10+ year head start at developing these children’s ideas and mindsets toward violence. it’s not too late, but the chances of success have diminished so that you focus your time and efforts on those who are likely to benefit from it the most and just pray for the rest.

    this is why the home must be the starting block for success in our community. by the time these children hit first grade, they have been indoctrinated with what ever set of standards and morals and values that the parents have laid out in front of them and now we’re asking the teachers, schools, community centers and mentors to undo all of that influence that was embedded in them by the people that feed and clothe and protect them.

    it has to start at home.

  10. please pardon the spelling and grammatical errors . . . my passion about this incident led me to not spellcheck . . .lol

  11. holdingut Says:

    I live in a small city 250 miles away from Chicago but my 16 year old son has plenty of friends from Chicago who have a city mentality. By this I mean that whole Im going to do you before you do me attitude bc im not a punk. Im in no way condoning the violence that occured but somepeople are products of their enviroment. Imagine growing up in a place where every male you know is either dead, in jail or on the block slanging. Where problems are solved with guns instead of with words? Were a simple insult leds to bloodshed.
    That being said my sorority sister and I are starting a non profit agency whose focus will be on training teens how to handle conflict without violence.

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