Single Sisters Speak Out

The Modern Life of the Single Sister

I am NOT the father June 23, 2009

So, Father’s Day has come and gone. And I received 4 “Happy Father’s Day” text messages from well-meaning friends. I don’t know when it became cool to start calling our mothers our fathers because they’ve done everything for us (those from single-parent homes) Yes, she may have done everything…and I do everything for my son, but….mother’s can never replace fathers. There is a bond and a different feeling you have towards your father, that you cannot have with your mother. I did not have my father in my life for the majority of it. We spoke a little. I knew who he was. To many of my siblings (who I feel are bitter that he wasn’t there) he’s Fred….to me he’s dad. There’s just something there that’s unexplainable and reach’s beyond his lack of parenting as I was growing up. Maybe I’m just more forgiving because you can’t change the past but you can work towards a better future.

I don’t think anyone if given the choice of having both parents instead of one…would choose to have their mother parent them alone. Though I am not marrying the father of my child, I can only hope that my son’s father would remain in his life in the fatherly capacity. I never experienced a step-dad so I don’t know how my son will feel towards my future husband. I feel like the blood bonds you. I have family members that I did not grow up with but care about just off the strength that we are connected through blood. Ones that I CAN’T STAND but love regardless.

My bigger and main point is mother’s…all mother’s…single, surrogate, and what not…have their day. Whether they’re “playing” all the roles or not…they have their day. Leave the father’s day to acknowledge the father’s that embody the word and not water it down to make mother’s who do it all by themselves feel comfortable about it. It’s been proven that it can be done, but no one WANTS to do it by themselves.