Today I was in a reflective mood just thinking over my life…reliving moments some funny, some bad. What really stuck out in my head was the moments where I would end up saying a little prayer…
Lord, I know I shouldn’t have but if you just find it in your heart to let me make it outta this I promise I wont do it anymore. Thank you in advance!
These moments were usually caused by BOREDOM!! My grandmother always said an idle mind was the devil’s playground and boy did my mind stay idle (especially when I was younger)… I suffer with boredom a lot now but I try my best not to exercise the plans that I conjure up in my head. 🙂 So far I think I do a pretty good job!
One particular boredom moment that stands out for me, that I really wish wasn’t brought on by boredom, was when I lost my virginity. This situation was more so brought on by curiosity that was later carried out by boredom. I mean the person was a dear friend at the time and I did have a little liking towards him, but he wasn’t someone special. He wasn’t even a person that I could have seen as a boyfriend!! But hey then again what do you even know at 16!? Back then I thought that I was gonna marry Devante or Mr. Dalvin from Jodeci and where the heck are they now??!! Everything about the situation was so not right! There was no music, no candles, not even some swanky dinner prepared by him. Instead it took place at his house in the basement on an oddly shaped brown velvet chair. The event lasted all of 5 minutes. When it was over I remember thinking, “Is this what all my active friends have been raving about?? If so, this was not the business!!” It wasn’t until a few years later while with my boyfriend that I truly experienced what I should have felt- The big “O”! It was then that I really regretted my decision that I made during boredom!! Because of this regret I reached out to my 13 year old sister and let her know its better to wait preferably when you are married, but if you cant wait til then at least try to wait until you are mature and out of high school.
Of course there have been other situations since then that have occurred due to boredom: Fraternizing with a low down ex, entertaining a random dude who wouldn’t have gotten the time otherwise, pity s!ex, and of out of town trips (with no good intentions). *smh*
What has boredom gotten you to do?